


Card Captor Onmyouji

by Tammaiya



Category: Cardcaptor Sakura, X -エックス- | X/1999
Genre: Crack, Fuuma helps a bro out, M/M, Wherein Seishirou is Tomoyo's father, she inherited the stalker gene, this is an angst-free zone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-09-26
Updated: 2004-09-26
Packaged: 2018-08-10 04:07:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7829845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tammaiya/pseuds/Tammaiya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Touya and Fuuma are school penpals. Touya, Yukito, Sakura and Tomoyo end up going on an exchange trip to Tokyo.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Card Captor Onmyouji

From: Monou Fuuma  
To: Kinomoto Touya  
Subject: Exchange  
  
Touya-san,  
  
There was an announcement today about some of the students in the inter-school program going on exchange to Tokyo- does this include Tomoeda High, and if so, will you and Yukito-san be coming? You should meet Kamui-kun.  
  
Fuuma  
  
  
From: Kinomoto Touya  
To: Monou Fuuma  
Subject: RE: Exchange  
  
Fuuma-san,  
  
Yeah, Yuki and I are on the exchange. So's the brat- I was about to send you an email when I received yours first. We'll be staying on campus, apparently. Don't really know the details yet, but Dad thinks it's a good opportunity and Yuki's grandparents trust him to look after himself. After everything I've heard, looking forward to meeting you and Shirou-san.  
  
Touya  
  
  
From: Daidouji Sonomi  
To: Sakurazuka Seishirou  
Subject: Tomoyo  
  
Our daughter is going on a trip to Tokyo with her best friend. She'll be staying at CLAMP Campus. I expect you to take care of her. Or else.  
  
Sonomi  
  
~  
  
Seishirou stared at the screen for about five minutes before sighing. He could feel a headache coming on; he hadn't seen Tomoyo since she was about four. Three years after the Bet, if he recalled correctly, and that had been more out of mild curiosity than any real fatherly instincts.  
  
The concept of him being a _father_ still seemed terribly foreign.  
  
Still, he reasoned, he could hardly be blamed. He was young and stupid, Sonomi was drunk and depressed, and was it _his_ fault he'd been bored? Picking up random women in bars had had a lot more appeal when he was 23 than it did now, he'd found. Though that was before he'd started to take any real interest in Subaru, of course, and given the option of stalking his favourite plaything he tended to get bored much less frequently.  
  
Oh, yes. Subaru. Seishirou was probably going to have to give him some form of explanation for Tomoyo at some point. Damn.  
  
How old would his daughter be by now, anyway? Ten? Eleven? Something like that. If she was anything like her mother she was probably crazy. He almost wondered if there was anything she took from him. Certainly not his eyes, and not his name, either.  
  
He'd been a bit miffed about that last one, come to think of it. If he had to carry on his genes, couldn't he at least carry on his family name too?  
  
No, Sonomi had informed him, and if he kept on about it he could jump in a lake.  
  
Sometimes it was tempting to explain to her precisely whom she was bossing around, but he had so far refrained. Mainly because he didn't think she would be overly impressed. See? _Crazy_.  
  
Well, if Tomoyo was going to be staying at CLAMP Campus, at least that was a good excuse to bother Subaru. Not that he needed one, obviously, but it would be amusing to see Subaru's reaction to Seishirou's almost _legitimate_ reason to be hanging around.  
  
Seishirou's mind caught up to his smirk a split-second after that thought and he winced. It would be amusing to see Subaru's reaction, but preferably from a distance and from the perspective of anyone other than Seishirou.  
  
All right, maybe there weren't any bright sides after all.  
  
~  
  
"You'll take care of Sakura-chan, won't you dear?" Sonomi asked, a fond smile on her face as she thought of Nadeshiko's sweet daughter.  
  
"Of course, Mama," Tomoyo said reassuringly. It wasn't a particularly necessary promise; Tomoyo took care of Sakura whenever she could.  
  
"Speaking of which, your father should be there to make sure you're alright," Sonomi added, though somewhat dubiously. Seishirou had all the parenting instincts of pondweed.  
  
Tomoyo blinked. Her mother didn't usually mention her father; Tomoyo knew next to nothing about him-- she hadn't seen a picture, and she didn't even know his name. As far as she was aware, she'd only met him once. Given that that had been when she was about four, she really didn't remember much at all.  
  
"My father?" she echoed eventually.  
  
"Yes, your father. He lives in Tokyo."  
  
Tomoyo contemplated this carefully. "How will I recognise him?" she asked, because she was a fairly intelligent girl and she thought there might be a problem if neither of them knew what the other looked like.  
  
"Tall, dark hair, gold eyes. He'll find you first, if he knows what's good for him," Sonomi said, narrowing her eyes dangerously.  
  
Tomoyo sweatdropped.  
  
"His name is Sakurazuka Seishirou," Sonomi continued, unconcerned by Tomoyo's reaction. "That was what first caught my interest, actually. Well, aside from the fact that he was incredibly good-looking, that is. Nadeshiko always did love sakura…"  
  
Her expression grew dreamy as her thoughts returned to her beloved cousin, and Tomoyo edged nervously away while her mother was distracted. She wasn't _quite_ that bad, was she?  
  
No, surely not.  
  
~  
  
"That brat is not coming."  
  
"Oniichan!" Sakura exclaimed loudly in self-righteous indignation, "Li-kun is my _friend_!"  
  
Touya winced, ears ringing. "You're going to burst my eardrums, monster."  
  
"I'm not a monster!" Sakura yelled, foot raised to stomp on Touya's much abused instep and scowl plastered across her usually sunny face.  
  
"To~ya?"  
  
Foot drops innocently to ground, cue angelic expression. The transformation never ceased to amaze Touya, and he sighed as his younger sister prepared to accost his best friend yet again. _I am not jealous of Sakura_ , he reminded himself.  
  
"Yukito-san!"  
  
_Really_.  
  
"Oh, hello Sakura-san," Yukito said, sending the little monster into her usual 'hanyaan!' mode. Touya could practically see the love hearts floating above her head.  
  
Sometimes he wished Yuki wasn't quite so nice. Of course, then he wouldn't be Yuki, and Touya would have to do something he'd rather not do if Sakura's feelings got hurt, but…  
  
ARGH.  
  
Touya crossed his arms and snorted, maybe just the slightest bit sullen. Yuki's attention and smile returned to focus on him at that, and Touya allowed himself to feel mildly smug. He should probably feel guilty or at least petty about being so secretly triumphant about winning Yuki's attention over his little sister, but really. With how much she insisted on interrupting their time together-- particularly when he was trying to tell Yuki something rather _important_ \-- it was understandable that he was getting a little frustrated.  
  
"To~ya, are you packed for the exchange trip?"  
  
"Aa," he replied, smiling slightly himself. He was looking forward to it; he and Yuki would be sharing a dorm, Sakura would be nearby but not _too_ nearby, and he might finally get to tell Yuki what he'd been trying to tell him for what seemed like eternity.  
  
"I'm packed too!" Sakura piped up, anxious not to be left out of the conversation and completely forgetting about her bid to persuade Touya to let Li come with them on the exchange.  
  
That the Chinese brat wouldn't be coming only made life all the sweeter, Touya reflected, and his smile grew briefly to a smirk.  
  
~  
  
"…and so Touya-san will be staying on campus," Fuuma concluded, done explaining to Kamui what was happening with the exchange.  
  
"That's nice," Kamui said vaguely.  
  
If Fuuma didn't know better, he'd swear that Kamui was annoyed about something.  
  
"Tsukishiro-san and Touya's younger sister are coming too," he added. "Given how much Touya-san talks about them it'll be interesting to finally meet all of them."  
  
"Tsukishiro-san is his best friend, right?" Kamui asked, tone strangely brighter. Fuuma wondered if he'd missed something or if he was just imagining it. Why would the fact that Touya was bringing his best friend cheer Kamui up?  
  
Nope, definitely imagining it.  
  
"Yes, that's right," Fuuma answered, gazing up at the ceiling with a smile. From what he wrote in the emails, Touya was very… devoted… to his best friend. Rather like Fuuma was to Kamui, actually. Made him wonder if… no, never mind. It was silly. Still…  
  
Lying on his bed with his arms crossed behind his neck, Fuuma turned his head to face the boy sitting next to him. "Hey, Kamui."  
  
Kamui flopped back, hands clasped over his hips and grinning at the slight 'oof!' when he decided to use Fuuma's stomach as a pillow. "Yeah?"  
  
Fuuma didn't have any idea what he wanted to say, actually. Looking away from the curious violet eyes focussed on his own, he sighed. "Nothing."  
  
"Huh."  
  
There was a comfortable silence where they both stared up at the ceiling, Kamui's eyes drifting slowly shut. He looked so cute like that, Fuuma thought, sweet and innocent and not at all like the brat he could be sometimes. If he just moved his hand, he could touch Kamui's cheek…  
  
"Kamui-chan! Nii-chan!"  
  
"Kotori-chan!" Kamui exclaimed, jumping up happily.  
  
_I love my sister_ , Fuuma reminded himself. _I am a caring older brother. I am not jealous of my sister. I do not want to kill my sister._  
  
Kotori grabbed Kamui's arm, tugging gently with a love-struck expression on her face. "Kamui-chan, Nii-chan, can we go for a picnic?"  
  
Kamui lit up and cast a hopeful look at Fuuma. Fuuma shrugged and pushed himself up off the bed. "Let's go, then."  
  
_Really_.  
  
~  
  
"Subaru-san, would you mind doing me a favour?"  
  
Subaru blinked. "Imonoyama-san?"  
  
"Would you be able to help take care of the exchange students?"  
  
Subaru's first thought was 'why me?', quickly followed up by 'what exchange students?'.  
  
"… What exchange students?" he asked eventually, figuring it was probably the more sensible question.  
  
"Some of our students have been emailing students from schools outside of Tokyo, and the students they have been communicating with are coming to stay on campus for a week," Nokoru explained. "Kamui-kun's friend Monou Fuuma-kun is one of the students involved, I believe."  
  
Subaru was really, really tempted to ask 'why me?' now. It took a lot of effort to refrain, and a similar exertion of willpower not to simply refuse. Nokoru had been kind enough to allow the Dragons of Heaven to stay in his mansion, and he'd always been particularly considerate of Subaru, so it was only fair to agree. Beyond that, he somehow had the suspicion that Kamui would be happier if he did. However, Subaru couldn't help but notice he had a very bad feeling about this.  
  
He probably would have refused after all, had he known what lay in store for him.  
  
~  
  
"Wah! Tokyo! It's Tokyo, look Tomoyo-chan!"  
  
"Hn."  
  
"To~ya, is that CLAMP Campus?"  
  
"Aa."  
  
"Wow, it's so big… To~ya?"  
  
"Yes, Yuki?"  
  
"Yukito-san!"  
  
"Oh, Sakura-chan!"  
  
"… Oi. Monster."  
  
"I AM NOT A-"  
  
"Are we here, To~ya?"  
  
Touya smirked as his eardrums and presumably his foot were once again saved by Yuki's timely intervention. Maybe there was some good in the little monster having a crush on his best friend after all.  
  
Comparatively minute good, mind you.  
  
"Yeah. That's Fuuma-san there," Touya said, pointing out the window at a tall dark-haired boy as the bus slowed to a stop.  
  
"Ne, Tomoyo-chan! … Tomoyo-chan?"  
  
"Tall, dark hair, gold eyes…" Tomoyo muttered to herself, studying the group assembled outside the bus. "Oh! I'm sorry, Sakura-chan!"  
  
"What were you looking at?" Sakura asked curiously. Tomoyo wasn't directly involved in the exchange programme, so why would she be searching for someone amongst the students?  
  
"Oh, nothing special," Tomoyo answered, smiling as always at the attention Sakura paid her.  
  
She didn't think her father was there yet, anyway.  
  
~  
  
Seishirou wondered idly if he was supposed to recognise his daughter through some form of psychic link. Sonomi never had been a particularly practical or sensible person, and the thought of sending a photo probably hadn't even crossed her mind. Oh well, there couldn't be that many people on the bus. He'd figure it out, by process of elimination fail all else.  
  
Meanwhile, he scanned the crowd to stave off his boredom. There was that kid-- the _Kamui_ , if he wasn't mistaken-- and next to him…  
  
Well. Wasn't _that_ interesting?  
  
When he was about to go over to see precisely what his Subaru-kun was up to, however, he was intercepted by a small girl with long black hair. Hm. She somehow reminded him of someone…  
  
Oh yes. His mother.  
  
Wait, this must be his daughter.  
  
"Excuse me, are you Sakurazuka Seishirou?"  
  
"Yes, I am. You're Tomoyo, I assume?"  
  
Tomoyo bowed politely. "Pleased to meet you."  
  
Seishirou nodded slightly. "Likewise. Your mother said you'd be with someone?"  
  
"Tomoyo-chan! Tomoyo-chan, where are you?"  
  
"Yes," Tomoyo sighed happily. "With Sakura-chan. Over here!"  
  
Seishirou vaguely considered killing one or both of the girls to save his ears from the resultant high-pitched chatter, but decided against it. He didn't tend to kill without at least a mildly good reason, and a headache didn't really cut it. Besides, as much as he'd prefer not to admit it… Sonomi vaguely scared him.  
  
"This is my father."  
  
"Oh, wow!" Sakura's eyes grew as large as saucers-- Tomoyo never even mentioned her father, so to meet him was entirely unexpected. Seishirou internally snorted in mild amusement at her name. "Pleased to meet you! I'm Kinomoto Sakura."  
  
"Sakurazuka Seishirou," Seishirou said, idly noting the starry-eyed way his daughter was staring at the other girl. He wondered if perhaps she had inherited the stalker gene from him. It was certainly an interesting thought.  
  
~  
  
"Fuuma-san."  
  
"Touya-san. This is Kamui-kun."  
  
Kamui stared at Touya as if assessing him. Touya was rather unnerved, especially given the aura of power surrounding the other boy. "Ah… nice to meet you."  
  
"Hi," Kamui said shortly. Fuuma glanced at him, mildly confused.  
  
"This is Yuki," Touya continued, expression softening as he gestured to his smiling companion.  
  
"Nice to meet you," Yukito said cheerfully.  
  
"Likewise," Fuuma said, surreptitiously noticing the way the two other boys stood close to each other. Hm. Best friends, huh?  
  
Abruptly Kamui's slight hostility melted away as he looked from one visitor to the other. Touya and Fuuma both noticed it, but not even Fuuma could begin to figure out why. Shrugging, he turned back to Touya.  
  
"Touya-san, have you got all your luggage?"  
  
Touya nodded. "Yeah, we don't have--" much, he was going to say, but then he paused. "Where's Sakura, Yuki?"  
  
Yukito blinked. "I think she went off to find Tomoyo-chan."  
  
That was odd in and of itself, but then Kamui noticed another absence.  
  
"Huh? Subaru?"  
  
"He went for a walk," Fuuma said helpfully. "Back that way. I think he saw something." Which was correct, in a manner of speaking, but what Fuuma didn't realise was that Subaru had seen something and promptly gone in the opposite direction.  
  
"Oh," Kamui said. "Oh well."  
  
"Oi, Sakura!" Touya called, figuring that she'd probably hear and hopefully deign to come back.  
  
"Yes, Nii-san?" Sakura asked running back with Tomoyo and Seishirou following behind. "You wanted me?"  
  
"Don't run off," Touya said flatly. He turned to find Kamui staring at something behind him, completely white. "Hey, what…?"  
  
"Sa-sakura-" Kamui squeaked.  
  
Seishirou smirked. Everyone else just blinked.  
  
"She's my younger sister," Touya said eventually. This kid was _weird_. Still, Fuuma obviously liked him. In fact, given the protective way Fuuma was standing slightly in front of the smaller boy, he figured there was something a little more than 'liking' going on there. Hm.  
  
"I'll show you to your dorms," Fuuma said after a long silence.  
  
This may turn out to be entertaining after all, Seishirou reflected. But where the hell did Subaru go?  
  
~  
  
Subaru had, on occasion, been accused of all manner of personality defects; stupidity, lack of self-preservation and masochism were amongst them. However, be that as it may, these things did not extend to hanging around waiting for Seishirou to notice and then accost him in front of witnesses.  
  
What was Seishirou _doing_ here, anyway? It couldn't be for the sole purpose of bothering Subaru. At least, Subaru hoped not.  
  
Subaru found he was quite suspicious of Seishirou's presence on CLAMP Campus. Last he'd seen, the assassin had been talking to two young girls who were, if he was not mistaken, part of the exchange. What possible reason could he have to be talking to small girls? He didn't exactly have a penchant for it, last time Subaru had checked, and-- possible paedophiliac tendencies that Subaru wasn't _quite_ certain he could rule out aside-- he was almost positive that Seishirou was gay.  
  
Subaru had a lot of personal evidence to support that view, after all.  
  
Whichever way, he didn't think that children would really be doing anything likely to endanger Japan, probably putting assassination out-- the Sakurazukamori was only supposed to kill with good reason, generally for a contract-- so why on Earth was Seishirou here?  
  
He was not curious enough to go and ask, however. _Never_ that curious. He should try and find Kamui and the others, anyway.  
  
~  
  
"This is my sister Kotori." Fuuma gestured to the girl between him and Kamui, and she smiled. Touya was privately marvelling at her striking resemblance to his mother.  
  
"Hi," Kotori said shyly. She seemed nice enough.  
  
"Would you like help unpacking?" Fuuma offered.  
  
"No, that's fine," Touya replied. "Thanks for the offer."  
  
"Kamui-chan, would you like to go out for ice cream?" Kotori asked, tugging on his sleeve. Touya caught a flash of resignation from Fuuma, and felt suddenly sympathetic.  
  
_Looks like his sister has a crush on his best friend too. Poor guy._  
  
"Eh?" Kamui blinked, and glanced over at Fuuma. "Sure. Fuuma?"  
  
"I don't really feel like ice cream today," Fuuma answered with a wry grin. "Go without me, I'll show Touya-san and Yukito-san around the campus."  
  
Kamui seemed rather torn, glancing from brother to sister with a mildly distressed expression, but eventually he decided to accept and go with the flow. "Okay. I'll see you later, Fuuma."  
  
"Yeah, see you," Fuuma said, waving as his sister dragged Kamui off. "Where would you like to go first? High school division?"  
  
Touya wondered idly if intervention in certain relationships would be welcome, and then wondered why he was even considering it. Usually he was a great believer in minding his own business.  
  
Then again, Fuuma sort of reminded him of himself in a way.  
  
~  
  
"And this is Sakura-chan in the dress I made her for the Hanami festival!"  
  
Seishirou had been right when he thought that Tomoyo reminded him of someone, but wrong when he said his mother. They looked similar, true, but Tomoyo truly reminded him of Hokuto. It was a scary but rather amusing thought.  
  
He had been completely correct about the stalker gene, however.  
  
"And this is Sakura-chan in the Valentines' Day clothes I made her," Tomoyo continued happily, flipping the page of the photo album.  
  
Seishirou sniggered mentally as he looked at the pink and heart-bestrewn dress, suddenly imagining Subaru in it. It was an entertaining thought, and he had no doubt that given the chance Hokuto would have loved to stuff her hapless twin in such an outfit. More than that, the long-suffering look of patience adorning the young girl's face looked just like the look Subaru used to wear in similar situations.  
  
Wait. That gave him an idea…  
  
"How quickly could you make a dress like that?" Seishirou asked, smirk turning rather evil. His tone suggested he was asking out of idle curiosity; his expression, though, told a completely different story.  
  
He was amused and surprised when his daughter's face lit up with a similar smile. Perhaps she had inherited a sadistic streak from him, too.  
  
"Why ever do you ask?" she responded sweetly, grey eyes glinting.  
  
This was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.  
  
~  
  
Over the last few days, Fuuma had noticed that Touya and Yukito seemed to be unnaturally unlucky at managing to get any private time alone. After walking in on several 'moments', and Sakura walking unknowingly in on even more, it had occurred to him that maybe he should ask Touya if this unfortunate string of interruptions was usual.  
  
Apparently it was so depressingly usual that Touya had yet to even tell Yukito how he felt. It would have been funny, Fuuma felt, if it weren't quite so frustrating. There was only one thing to be done about it: his interference was absolutely _imperative_ , especially since there was just one day left before the exchange students returned to Tomoeda.  
  
As Fuuma predicted it was more than likely that he or Sakura would walk in during one of Touya's attempted and aborted confessions next time it happened, he took the first step of sending Sakura off with Kotori and Tomoyo to go shopping for the entire afternoon.  
  
What? Girls _liked_ shopping. He hoped. Well, they'd seemed perfectly happy to go shopping for teddy bears, anyway. Whatever.  
  
That done, the next step was to wait until he walked in at an inconvenient time.  
  
Predictably enough, this happened later that day. Fuuma had been walking to the library to meet Kamui-- he hadn't even been _trying_ to find them-- when he'd practically crashed into Touya, who was bracing his hand on the wall next to Yukito's head with his other hand brushing the smaller boy's cheek.  
  
Sheesh, Touya really was cursed if he even got interrupted in such bizarre locations as this. It amazed Fuuma that Yukito managed to stay oblivious after all those attempts, too-- honestly, do one's male friends _normally_ go around touching one like that? Yukito needed a severe whack with the clue stick, if you asked him.  
  
Well, that was what Fuuma was here for.  
  
Giving Touya a wholly unapologetic grin, he tripped the other boy so he fell against Yukito. There was a stunned silence, Touya staring first at him and then at Yukito in shock while Yukito's eyes widened ever-so-slightly.  
  
Fuuma found he was suddenly suspicious. Maybe that obliviousness was an act after all and Yukito was really mildly sadistic and enjoyed playing hard to get? Or maybe not. Oh well.  
  
"Oops," Fuuma said innocently. "Sorry. I'll just be going, shall I?"  
  
Once he'd gone, the silence continued.  
  
"To~ya?" Yukito said patiently.  
  
"Yuki?" Touya answered blankly.  
  
"I'm waiting," Yuki reminded him gently.  
  
Touya stared at him for what felt like forever. "You're kidding me," he said weakly.  
  
"I don't think so, no."  
  
"You mean… this whole time…?"  
  
Yukito laughed, prompting Touya to kiss him just to shut him up. Not because he had been trying to kiss him for about a year now. Don't be silly.  
  
Hell, he was _never_ believing that innocent act ever again. Who'd have guessed Yuki could be so sneaky? And sadistic. Never forget sadistic. It almost made him wonder if it was somehow Yuki's fault they kept getting interrupted.  
  
… Nah.  
  
~  
  
When Fuuma and Kamui went back to Touya and Yukito's dorm after studying in the library, they noticed three things.  
  
One, Touya and Yukito were not there.  
  
Two, the door had been locked behind them.  
  
Three, there was a note pinned to the back of the door.  
  
"'Think of it as a returned favour,'" Kamui read, utterly confused. "'Or if you prefer, as revenge. You know what for. Touya and Yukito.' Huh?"  
  
"I think I want to kill him," Fuuma said conversationally. "Damn."  
  
Kamui blinked. "It's just a room. It won't bite you."  
  
That's not the problem, Fuuma wanted to say. The problem is me wanting to bite _you_.  
  
He had slightly better sense than that, though, so he instead he shrugged. "You never know. It _might_."  
  
Kamui rolled his eyes and flopped onto the bed. "So. You. Me. A bed. An indeterminate amount of time. Whatever shall we do? We shall die of boredom!"  
  
Fuuma narrowed his eyes. "You're joking, right? Please tell me you're joking."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"It just sounded… odd," Fuuma said evasively, resisting the urge to point out it sounded awfully like a come-on.  
  
"Really? I thought it sounded like a come-on. Damn it, I guess I need more practice," Kamui muttered, pouting.  
  
Fuuma pinched himself. When it didn't work, he tried it again. "I think I've entered the twilight zone," he said after the second try.  
  
Kamui curled his knees up to his chest and rested his chin on them, glaring at Fuuma sulkily. "Hello? Fuuma-kun? Me and the bed are waiting for you to get over your loss of faith in reality, you know. Could you maybe hurry it up a little?"  
  
Kamui was such a whiny bitch sometimes, Fuuma thought fondly, and went over to make friends with the bed.  
  
~  
  
After nearly a week of sewing, it was done.  
  
A masterpiece of pink, frills and lace and ribbons and hearts, all perfectly put together. Seishirou was mildly impressed-- Tomoyo was not only quick, she was _good_.  
  
It was exactly the right size for Subaru, which raised some slightly disturbing questions about precisely how Seishirou knew the accurate measurements, but they were the kind of questions the only people interested enough to ask probably didn't really want to hear the answer to.  
  
The preparations were complete. Tomoyo had gone out and left him with her camera; it was the second last day of the exchange, and all that remained to be done was to find Subaru and lure him in to the trap.  
  
It turned out to be much easier than he'd suspected-- he stepped out the door of Tomoyo and Sakura's dormitory to find Subaru rattling the handle of the door of the next room over.  
  
"Subaru-kun?"  
  
Subaru literally jumped, spinning around and plastering his back and palms against the door in fright. "Ack!"  
  
His day was not going well. He couldn't find Kamui and Fuuma, and when he tried to ask Touya and Yukito if they knew where the other two were, he'd found their door mysteriously locked. Now, on top of all that, he had to cope with Seishirou. Just great.  
  
"Did I frighten you?" Seishirou asked cheerfully, obviously taking joy out of Subaru's clear discomfort.  
  
"No," Subaru lied sourly. "What are you doing here?"  
  
Wait, hang on. Seishirou had just come out of a dorm. Why was Seishirou in a dorm? Wasn't that Touya's younger sister's dorm?  
  
Oh _Hell_. Please, please don't say that Seishirou had decided to take up molesting and/or killing small girls after all.  
  
"I was visiting my daughter," Seishirou explained, tone offhand as if there were nothing even slightly wrong with what he had just said.  
  
"Pardon?" Subaru said blankly. Out of all the possible reasons he had expected Seishirou to come up with, even the most far-fetched, that had not featured. "That was a joke, right? Please tell me you weren't being serious."  
  
"If it makes you feel any better, she was born the year _before_ the Bet," Seishirou offered considerately.  
  
Subaru stared. "Not really," he said faintly. "You're a _father_?"  
  
There was something utterly petrifying about the concept of Seishirou with children. Subaru shuddered.  
  
"Yes, I rather thought we'd covered that," Seishirou said dryly. "Since you're here, though, there was something else I wanted to talk to you about. Or not so much talk about as do, really."  
  
Subaru had enough time to process this, open his mouth and squawk " _What_?" in his most indignant yelp before Seishirou laid a hand against his forehead and put him to sleep.  
  
Well, shit. _That'll teach ME to walk around near Seishirou without some form of magic protective bubble_ , Subaru thought muzzily before passing out.  
  
~  
  
Seishirou stepped back to admire his handiwork smugly. It was rather good, if he did say so himself; the Sumeragi was just feminine enough to pull it off. Pink always had suited Subaru's complexion, and the ribbons in his hair were a nice touch too. Hokuto would be proud of him, Seishirou decided.  
  
The best bit had been undressing his Subaru-kun. Would have been more fun if Subaru had actually been _awake_ , though. Alas, perhaps next time.  
  
Laughing softly, he leaned over the figure on the bed, resting his weight on hands either side of the sleeping onmyouji's head. Subaru looked so sweet when he was sleeping. Seishirou was going to wake him up, of course, but he was going to do it in _style_.  
  
_Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty_ , he thought, privately amused as he lightly kissed Subaru's lips and released the spell, there long enough to establish his presence in Subaru's half-asleep mind before he sat back with a smirk.  
  
"I think it's a good look on you, Subaru-kun."  
  
"Huh?" Subaru sat up sleepily, rubbing a hand across his eyes and struggling to focus on Seishirou. Yawning, he tilted his head to the side uncertainly. "Seishirou-san?"  
  
"You should wear clothes like that more often," Seishirou added, obviously enjoying himself immensely.  
  
Subaru blinked. Subaru looked down. Subaru realised that he was not sixteen, and then he realised that he was wearing something that was pink, frilly, covered in hearts and ribbons and above all a _dress_.  
  
He made a strangled noise that translated loosely to, "KILL ME. Kill me now!"  
  
"Smile for the camera, Subaru-kun!"  
  
An enraged and blushing Subaru made an even better photo than Subaru sleeping, apparently.  
  
~  
  
When the Tomoeda students were gathered to go home, the occasion was accompanied by many promises to keep in touch and well wishes. Fuuma and Touya thanked each other, both smiling rather wryly, and Yukito and Kamui decided they may as well swap emails too since their boyfriends-- sorry, "best friends"-- already had. Subaru was there, if in a rather sulky mood and only because Seishirou had dragged him there (Kamui was really tempted to ask, and then decided he actually didn't want to know), and Seishirou, having found he was quite fond of his daughter, promised he'd visit some time.  
  
Sometime later, when the photos were developed, he made three copies of the second photo: one for himself, one for Tomoyo (he thought she'd appreciate it), and one, as he had never claimed his sense of humour to be anything but twisted, for Subaru.  
  
Seishirou even got it framed and wrote a message on the back:  
  
'Subaru-kun, isn't it a lovely photo? Don't give me that look. Yes you are, don't lie. I can _see_ you. No, I'm not stalking you, I'm on the other side of the room. No, it _doesn't_ count. Seishirou.'  
  
And they all lived happily ever after except for the dress, which Subaru tore up and then burned.


End file.
